One of the comments that didn’t get through moderation**:
IDK why you claim fat acceptance; you’re not fat enough. Your no skinny bitch but no fatter than an in betweenie. Leave us real fatties something for our own.
For starters, I do understand that there are times when I don’t experience fat hate — and the reason I don’t experience fat hate is because the other person involved doesn’t categorize me as “fat.” I understand that because what’s considered “fat” is a patchwork of guesswork and moving goalposts, there are times when I escape fat hate and body policing that other people experience. Essentially, there are probably plenty of fat people who have it worse than I do. I’m not denying that.
Valid points, however, still follow:
One: I don’t think one has to be fat in order to embrace fat acceptance, size acceptance, or Heath at Every Size. In other words, there’s no lower boundary of what counts as “fat enough” to participate in these movements. (There’s also no upper boundary, but I don’t think this “Anonymous” commenter was suggesting one.) That said, if the commenter was questioning why I claimed “fat” as a descriptor rather than “fat acceptance” as they said, there is point two.
Two: As I said, there are probably plenty of places where I do not experience discrimination on account of my body size. However, there remain plenty of places where I do experience size discrimination. Some of them are relatively harmless, like when some dudebro touches me in public because he thinks my body will jiggle or when people assume being my size means I’m not good at working out, or not . Other times, it materializes in bigger ways, like when my employer considers making obese employees pay more for their health care premiums (dear people: it’s not like I’m wiping my ass with all the extra monies I DON’T HAVE), doctors repeatedly blame issues like endometriosis and broken bones (hello, I slipped on a vibrator!) on being too fat, being told there are no clothes for me here, hiding from yoga in public, or restricting my food and caloric intake in ways that cross the line into obsessive.
In short, there are a number of times when I don’t deal with size discrimination where someone else might. I don’t deny that. But neither does that detract from the times when I do experience (often systemic) discrimination on account of my fat. So:
Three: I will claim this term because it applies to me.
Four: It’s not cool to body police and marginalize, even toward people who are “only a little” marginalized.
** I realize that I’m stricter on comment moderation than some (even most?) blogs. I just want to reiterate that I’m cool with respectful disagreement. However, I’m not okay with negating others’ lived experience or for name calling (and yes, referring to someone as a “skinny bitch,” even if that someone is not me, is name calling). While people are certainly entitled to make such comments, I will not provide a forum to do so here.